Marvelous Exemplars of National Pride: Sri Lankan Missions Overflowing with Politicians’ Progeny

Sri Lankan missions abroad: Where political pedigree reigns supreme, and national interests take a backseat to family ties.
by Our Diplomatic Affairs Editor

Oh, what a magnificent sight it is to behold! The esteemed foreign missions, sustained by the hard-earned cash of Sri Lankan citizens, have become delightful playgrounds for our beloved politicians and their extended families. It’s truly heartwarming to witness how these selfless individuals graciously share the burden of public service with their dear offspring. After all, what better way to enhance the national interests of our country than by cultivating a family dynasty within the hallowed walls of embassies across the globe?

Regardless of political affiliation, our politicians, with their unparalleled wisdom and astuteness, have ensured that their children and relatives fill the coveted positions in these prestigious institutions. Who needs qualified diplomats when you can have the bloodline of a seasoned politician instead? The mere notion of meritocracy is so passé; it’s far more efficient to have a direct lineage to power.

Let’s take a moment to appreciate the illustrious list of luminaries whose offspring have graced these embassies. Tissa Attanayake’s child has found their calling in the enchanting land of Australia. Piyal Nishantha’s talented progeny has set sail to the United Kingdom, and Duminda Dissanayake’s family member adds a touch of elegance to the charming streets of France. Oh, the United States is truly blessed with the presence of SB Dissanayake’s relative, and Italy rejoices in the eminence of Susil Premajayantha’s kin. Let’s not forget the delightful family ties of Shantha Bandara in France and the enchanting presence of Arundika Fernando’s offspring in Australia. To the citizens of these countries, please know that your generosity has allowed our nation’s garbage to grace your embassy halls, all while feasting on your hard-earned money.

Birender Kumar Yadav (India), Walking on the Roof of Hell, 2016.

It’s truly inspiring to witness how these political dynasties shamelessly exploit their positions for personal gain. The audacity with which they parasitize the national economy knows no bounds. We should all applaud their dedication to burdening the public and their steadfast commitment to transforming embassies into family picnics. It’s a glorious spectacle, indeed.

So, dear politicians, in the spirit of public service and your unyielding desire to uphold the reputation of our nation, we beseech you to step down from your lofty perches. Spare us, the humble citizens, the burden of financing your lavish family vacations and allow us to divert those funds to more pressing matters. Perhaps, with your invaluable expertise, you could find gainful employment elsewhere and continue to ease the public’s burden in your own unique way.

Let us celebrate the exemplary deeds of these political appointees who have managed to single-handedly tarnish the reputation of our beloved country. Their commitment to nepotism and unabashed self-interest is a testament to the heights we can achieve when we prioritize personal gain over national welfare. We eagerly await their magnanimous decision to step down, allowing fresh talent to grace the embassies and restore the faith of the Sri Lankan people.