Creating a culture of peace relies fundamentally on understanding the critical role of suppressed feelings (emotions) in shaping deep culture and generating conflicts, including violent conflicts, and then taking action that addresses this cause.
by Robert J. Burrowes
The date 11
November is well known and commemorated in many parts of the world because it
marks the Armistice ending World War I – ‘the Great War’ – in 1918.
In the evocative
words used by Kurt Vonnegut Jr., an atheist humanist, in his novel Breakfast
of Champions, the day is remembered thus:
‘When I was a boy … all the people of all
the nations which fought in the First World War were silent during the eleventh
minute of the eleventh hour of Armistice Day, which was the eleventh day of the
eleventh month. It was at that minute in nineteen-hundred and eighteen, that
millions upon millions of human beings stopped butchering one another. I have
talked to old men who were on battlefields at that minute. They have told me in
one way or another that the sudden silence was the Voice of God. So we still
have among us some men who can remember when God spoke clearly to mankind.’
And what, exactly, did God (by whatever
name: Allah, Krishna, Yahweh…) or the Gods say? we might ask. Well even those
who profess little more than scant knowledge of religious texts that purport to
represent the word of God might suggest that s/he simply breathed a (silent)
sigh of relief that the insanity of mass warfare had ended. For now at least.
For those of us concerned with the struggle
to create cultures of peace or, even, a world culture of peace, there are some
fundamental questions to consider including the classic question discussed by
two of humanity’s greats – Albert Einstein and Sigmund Freud – when they
tackled the question ‘Why War?’
Of course, as many people now understand
it, peace entails far more than simply a state without military (including
terrorist) violence and war. Beyond these forms of violence, many exponents of
peace seek the end of other dimensions of what I call ‘visible’ violence,
including:
1. Direct violence that goes beyond military violence, such
as ‘biological violence’ (that is, violence against the body) in the
family home and as a result of violent crime as well as ‘physical violence’
(that is, constraints on movement). See ‘Violence, Peace, and Peace
Research’.
2. Institutional violence: socially endorsed violence including that
inflicted by parents, teachers, police, legal and prison systems – see ‘Punishment is Violent and
Counterproductive’ and ‘The Rule of Law: Unjust and
Violent’ –
and which now manifests in a myriad other forms with the emergence of the surveillance
state that spies on and gathers endless data on individuals to build
substantial personal profiles on each – linking many personal records including
those related to health and financial matters with political activities and consumption
patterns – in violation of any basic understanding of, or commitment to, human
rights in their many political, economic, social, cultural and other forms.
3. Structural violence which Mohandas K. Gandhi originally
identified when making his observation that ‘exploitation is violence’
and Professor Johan Galtung – see ‘A Structural Theory of
Imperialism’
and ‘Violence, Peace, and Peace
Research’ –
later elaborated as violence built into structures, such as capitalism and
imperialism, that deprive some people of the opportunities to live full and
meaningful lives and manifest, for example, as poverty, homelessness and the
economic exploitation of people who live in Africa, Asia and Central/South
America. And
4. Ecological violence: those activities ranging from destruction
of the climate and rainforests to the killing of insects and wildlife that
constitute destruction of the biosphere.
Of course, these categories are not
mutually exclusive but they serve to illustrate categories of violence not
always recognized as such.
Apart from these forms of ‘visible’
violence Professor Johan Galtung also identified the importance of psychological
violence – ‘lies, brainwashing, indoctrination of various kinds, threats,
etc. that serve to decrease mental potentialities’ see ‘Violence, Peace, and Peace
Research’ –
and coined the term ‘cultural violence’ to describe ‘those aspects of
culture, the symbolic sphere of our existence – exemplified by religion and
ideology, language and art, empirical science and formal science (logic, mathematics)
– that can be used to justify or legitimize direct or structural violence’. See
‘Cultural Violence’.
Beyond these and other categories of
violence – including patriarchy and racism as specific
manifestations of violence that are, arguably, simultaneously direct,
structural and cultural – which stand between humanity and a culture of peace, there
are two other categories of violence which I will argue it is necessary to end
before we can make profound inroads in ending those mentioned above.
These two categories – which I have labeled
‘invisible’ violence and ‘utterly invisible’ violence – describe
vitally important categories of violence which human adults inflict on
children. Moreover, complemented by the ‘visible’ violence that adults inflict
on children, it is this ‘invisible’ and ‘utterly invisible’ violence which
destroys the unique human individual who was created during a nine-month
gestation period and turns them into a ‘socially constructed delusional
identity’ who submissively fulfils the extraordinarily limited expectations of
their particular adult world and, with only rare exceptions, willingly
participates in many if not all of the other forms of violence that torment our
world and certainly includes inflicting invisible and utterly invisible
violence on their own children. Which is why the cycle of violence goes on.
Why is this?
Because society is preoccupied with
producing submissively obedient students, workers, soldiers, citizens (that is,
taxpayers and voters) and consumers. Hence, the last thing society wants is
powerful individuals who are each capable of searching their conscience,
feeling their emotional response to events, thinking critically and behaving
strategically in response. For that reason our parenting and education models
use a ruthless combination of visible, ‘invisible’ and ‘utterly invisible’
violence to ensure that our children become terrified, self-hating and
powerless individuals like virtually all of the adults around them.
How does this happen? What is this
‘invisible’ and ‘utterly invisible’ violence?
Perpetrators of violence learn their craft
in childhood. If you inflict violence on a child, they learn to inflict
violence on others. The political leaders who decide to wage war, the military
leaders who plan and conduct it, as well as the soldiers, sailors and aircraft
personnel who fight war each suffered violence as a child. The terrorist suffered
violence as a child. The man who inflicts violence on his partner suffered
violence as a child. The corporate executive who exploits working class people
and/or those who live in Africa, Asia or Central/South America suffered
violence as a child. The racist or religious bigot suffered violence as a
child. The individual who perpetrates violence in the home, in the schoolyard
or on the street suffered violence as a child. The individual who overconsumes,
or even consumes certain products, and/or otherwise destroys the biosphere,
suffered violence as a child.
If we want to end violence in all of its
manifestations and create a culture of peace, locally and globally, then we
must finally end our longest and greatest war: the adult war on children. And
here is an additional incentive: if we do not tackle the fundamental cause of
violence, then our combined and unrelenting efforts to tackle all of its other
symptoms must ultimately fail. And extinction at our own hand is inevitable.
How can I claim that violence against
children is the fundamental cause of all other violence? Consider this. There
is universal acceptance that behaviour is shaped by childhood experience. If it
was not, we would not put such effort into education and other efforts to
socialize children to ‘fit into’ their society. And this is why many
psychologists have argued that exposure to war toys and violent video games
shapes attitudes and behaviours in relation to violence.
But it is far more complex than this and,
strange though it may seem, it is not just the ‘visible’ violence (such as
hitting, screaming at and sexually abusing) that we normally label ‘violence’
that causes the main damage, although this is extremely damaging. The largest
component of damage arises from the ‘invisible’ and ‘utterly invisible’
violence that we adults unconsciously inflict on children during the ordinary
course of the day. Tragically, the bulk of this violence occurs in the family
home and at school. See ‘Why Violence?’ and ‘Fearless Psychology and
Fearful Psychology: Principles and Practice’.
So what is ‘invisible’ violence? It is the
‘little things’ we do every day, partly because we are just ‘too busy’. For
example, when we do not allow time to listen to, and value, a child’s thoughts
and feelings, the child learns to not listen to themSelf thus destroying their
internal communication system. When we do not let a child say what they want
(or ignore them when they do), the child develops communication and behavioral
dysfunctionalities as they keep trying to meet their own needs (which, as a
basic survival strategy, they are genetically programmed to do).
When we blame, condemn, insult, mock,
embarrass, shame, humiliate, taunt, goad, guilt-trip, deceive, lie to, bribe,
blackmail, moralize with and/or judge a child, we both undermine their sense of
Self-worth and teach them to blame, condemn, insult, mock, embarrass, shame,
humiliate, taunt, goad, guilt-trip, deceive, lie, bribe, blackmail, moralize
and/or judge.
The fundamental outcome of being bombarded
throughout their childhood by this ‘invisible’ violence is that the child is
utterly overwhelmed by feelings of fear, pain, anger and sadness (among many
others). However, mothers, fathers, teachers, religious figures and other
adults also actively interfere with the expression of these feelings and the
behavioral responses that are naturally generated by them and it is this
‘utterly invisible’ violence that explains why the dysfunctional behavioral
outcomes actually occur.
For example, by ignoring a child when they
express their feelings, by comforting, reassuring or distracting a child when
they express their feelings, by laughing at or ridiculing their feelings, by
terrorizing a child into not expressing their feelings (for example, by
screaming at them when they cry or get angry), and/or by violently controlling
a behavior that is generated by their feelings (for example, by hitting them,
restraining them or locking them into a room), the child has no choice but to
unconsciously suppress their awareness of these feelings.
However, once a child has been terrorized
into suppressing their awareness of their feelings (rather than being allowed
to have their feelings and to act on them) the child has also unconsciously
suppressed their awareness of the reality that caused these feelings. This has
many outcomes that are disastrous for the individual, for society and for
nature because the individual will now easily suppress their awareness of the
feelings that would tell them how to act most functionally in any given
circumstance and they will progressively acquire a phenomenal variety of
dysfunctional behaviors, including some that are violent towards themself,
others and/or the Earth.
From the above, it should also now be
apparent that punishment should never be used. ‘Punishment’, of course, is one
of the words we use to obscure our awareness of the fact that we are using
violence. Violence, even when we label it ‘punishment’, scares children and
adults alike and cannot elicit a functional behavioural response. See ‘Punishment is Violent and
Counterproductive’.
If someone behaves dysfunctionally, they
need to be listened to, deeply, so that they can start to become consciously
aware of the feelings (which will always include fear and, often, terror) that
drove the dysfunctional behaviour in the first place. They then need to feel
and express these feelings (including any anger) in a safe way. Only then will
behavioural change in the direction of functionality be possible. See ‘Nisteling: The Art of Deep
Listening’.
‘But these adult behaviors you have
described don’t seem that bad. Can the outcome be as disastrous as you claim?’
you might ask. The problem is that there are hundreds of these ‘ordinary’,
everyday behaviors that destroy the Selfhood of the child. It is ‘death by a
thousand cuts’ and most children simply do not survive as Self-aware
individuals. And why do we do this? As mentioned above, we do it so that each
child will fit into our model of ‘the perfect citizen’: that is, obedient and
hardworking student, reliable and pliant employee/soldier, and submissive
law-abiding citizen (that is, one who pays their taxes and votes and/or lobbies
politicians).
Moreover, once we destroy the Selfhood of a
child, it has many flow-on effects. For example, once you terrorize a child
into accepting certain information about themself, other people or the state of
the world, the child becomes unconsciously fearful of dealing with new
information, especially if this information is contradictory to what they have
been terrorized into believing. As a result, the child will unconsciously
dismiss new information out of hand.
In short, the child has been terrorized in
such a way that they are no longer capable of learning (or their learning
capacity is seriously diminished by excluding any information that is not a
simple extension of what they already ‘know’). If you imagine any of the bigots
you know, you are imagining someone who is utterly terrified. But it’s not just
the bigots; virtually all people are affected in this manner making them
incapable of responding adequately to new (or even important) information. This
is one explanation why some people are ‘climate deniers’, most people do
nothing in response to the climate catastrophe and even those people who do
take action usually do so ineffectively. See ‘The Global Climate Movement
is Failing: Why?’
But the same can be said for those working
to end war – see ‘The War to End War 100 Years
On: An Evaluation and Reorientation of our Resistance to War’ – end the nuclear weapons race or engage
in other struggles, including liberation struggles, that are vital parts of the
global struggle to create a culture of peace. See ‘Why Activists Fail’.
To briefly reiterate this vital point (that
each child has been terrorized in such a way that they are no longer capable of
learning or their learning capacity is seriously diminished): The multifaceted
violence inflicted throughout childhood and adolescence ensures that the adult
who emerges is suppressing awareness of an enormous amount of fear, pain,
sadness and anger (among many other feelings) and must live in delusion to
remain unaware of these suppressed feelings. This ensures that, as part of
their delusion, the individual develops a strong sense that what they are doing
already is functional and working (no matter how dysfunctional and ineffective
it may actually be) while unconsciously suppressing awareness of any evidence
that contradicts their delusion. They do this because, unconsciously, people
learn to identify obedience with ‘functional and working’ (because they do not
get punished for being obedient). See ‘Why Violence?’, ‘Fearless
Psychology and Fearful Psychology: Principles and Practice’, ‘Do We Want School or
Education?’
and ‘Love Denied: The Psychology
of Materialism, Violence and War’.
As an aside, if you want to read more
evidence of humanity’s ‘love’ for our children and get a clearer sense of just
how deeply violence is buried in human society, see ‘Humanity’s “Dirty Little
Secret”: Starving, Enslaving, Raping, Torturing and Killing our Children’.
Just one horrific outcome of this violence
against children is that our planet is run by a global elite that is completely
insane. See ‘The Global Elite is Insane
Revisited’.
And this elite plays a key role in driving many of the more obvious
manifestations of violence in our world.
Responding to Violence Strategically to
Create a World Culture of Peace
However we define the many positive elements
of a culture of peace – which will presumably include an inclusive philosophy
of society, a cooperative set of social relations, nonviolent methods for
dealing with conflict and sustainable patterns of matter-energy use while
allowing universal human access to the resources necessary to maintain health
and well-being, opportunities for meaningful political and economic engagement
as well as cultural opportunities in art, literature and music among its many
other forms, while engaging sustainably with the biosphere to enhance
life-opportunities for all other species – this culture of peace can only be
achieved if we respond strategically to the violence in our world.
And this means that we must address the
fundamental cause of human violence because this drives violence in each and
all of its other dimensions. For those adults powerful enough to do this, there
is an explanation in ‘Putting Feelings First’. And for those adults committed to
facilitating children’s efforts to realize their potential and become
self-aware (rather than delusional), see ‘My Promise to Children’.
Creating a culture of peace, therefore,
relies fundamentally on understanding the critical role of suppressed feelings
(emotions) in shaping deep culture and generating conflicts, including violent
conflicts, and then taking action that addresses this cause.
This includes the need to understand and
deal effectively with those emotions that are being acted out dysfunctionally
and/or being projected – see ‘The Psychology of Projection
in Conflict’
– in a particular context, which is standard human behaviour in many
situations. See ‘Nisteling: The Art of Deep
Listening’.
Otherwise, that most fundamental of emotions – fear – will continue to drive
most cultural predispositions and conflicts in all contexts and make genuine
resolution of conflicts virtually impossible. This is because it is only if
people are not afraid that discussions about ideas in relation to making
culture evolve as we plan (rather than unconsciously or as elites direct) and
to resolve conflict nonviolently, become easily possible.
Fundamentally, our parenting and education
models fail utterly to produce people of conscience, people who are emotionally
functional, people who are capable of critical analysis, people who care and
people who can plan and respond to violence strategically. As Professor Galtung
noted just recently, ‘While we are busy exploring whether there is intelligent
life on other planets, we might spend more time – and intelligence – exploring
whether there is [intelligent life] on ours.’ See ‘United States vs Moby Dick’. The problem is that once we terrorize a
child, the terrified adult who emerges from childhood behaves as guided by
their (unconscious) fear, not by any intelligence they may possess. Again, this
is routinely illustrated by the failure of even those who self-label as
‘activists’ to think, plan and act strategically. See ‘Why Activists Fail’.
Of course, we do not need to work on ending
violence against children in isolation. We can campaign to end other
manifestations of violence – such as war, nuclear weapons and power, economic
exploitation, ecological violence in its many forms including geoengineering
and the deployment of 5G, violence against women and indigenous peoples,
occupations and dictatorships – at the same time. See Nonviolent Campaign Strategy and Nonviolent Defense/Liberation
Strategy.
But if we work to end the many
manifestations of violence while failing to address the fundamental cause then,
ultimately, we must fail, even if we elongate our timeframe a little. See ‘Human Extinction by 2026? A
Last Ditch Strategy to Fight for Human Survival’.
If you are also interested in working
locally to reduce your consumption and become more self-reliant, in order to
reduce your ecological violence, consider participating in ‘The Flame Tree Project to Save Life on Earth’.
Alternatively, if you want something
simpler, consider committing to:
The Earth
Pledge
Out of love for the Earth and all of its
creatures, and my respect for their needs, from this day onwards I pledge that:
1. I will listen deeply to children (see explanation above)
2. I will not travel by plane
3. I will not travel by car
4. I will not eat meat and fish
5. I will only eat organically/biodynamically
grown food
6. I will minimize the amount of fresh
water I use, including by minimizing my ownership and use of electronic devices
7. I will not buy rainforest timber
8. I will not buy or use single-use
plastic, such as bags, bottles, containers, cups and straws
9. I will not use banks, superannuation
(pension) funds or insurance companies that provide any service to corporations
involved in fossil fuels, nuclear power and/or weapons
10. I will not accept employment from, or
invest in, any organization that supports or participates in the exploitation
of fellow human beings or profits from killing and/or destruction of the
biosphere
11. I will not get news from the corporate
media (mainstream newspapers, television, radio, Google, Facebook, Twitter…)
12. I will make the effort to learn a
skill, such as food gardening or sewing, that makes me more self-reliant
13. I will gently encourage my family and
friends to consider signing this pledge.
And you might wish
to join the worldwide movement of people working to end all violence by signing
the online pledge of ‘The People’s Charter to Create a
Nonviolent World’.
Conclusion
The foundation of
our violent world is the unending visible, invisible and utterly invisible
violence that human adults inflict on our children. For that reason, it does
not matter what superstructure we build on top of this foundation. Whether we use
capitalism (and ‘democracy’), socialism or any other political-economic-social
model, tack on a New Green Deal or a Just Transition, while the violent
foundation on which society is built – violence against children – remains
unaddressed, a culture of peace cannot be created.
So we need to raise children in a culture
that does not involve terrorizing them so that they end up perceiving violence
as the primary way to address conflict because they are too scared to simply
perceive the power of, and use, principled nonviolent options.
Hence, until our parenting and teaching
models are radically altered, a culture of peace will remain an impossible
dream. And human extinction in the near term is inevitable.
Biodata: Robert J.
Burrowes has a lifetime commitment to understanding and ending human violence.
He has done extensive research since 1966 in an effort to understand why human
beings are violent and has been a nonviolent activist since 1981. He is the
author of ‘Why Violence?’ His email address is flametree@riseup.net and his website is here.
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