One head, two heads or no head?

by Dr. Lakshman Ranasinghe

(August 17, Colombo, Sri Lanka Guardian) The conceptual and creative Editorials in The Island relentlessly activate and stimulate avid readers. The latest, yesterday, was on CFA – twice over.

The star tortoise with 2 heads interested and intrigued us all. Eating with both mouths was fair by both heads, but will he (or she) eat double the quantity? Imagine a few MPs having two heads! One possibility is that he would bite and eat with both heads. What would happen to the poor taxpayer, having to foot the bill for luxury hotel meals?On the other hand if he spoke with both mouths, the noise in parliament could be unbearable. Fortunately, the tortoise had one big head and one small. If dining in parliament was done through the small head, it would have a relieving effect on parliamentary expenses. However, if he starts blathering through the big head, unpleasant side - effects are very likely, on the proceedings. The tortoise also has an added bonus (or disadvantage), which we shall wait to hear about. Any MP who attends parliament with six feet is surely not going to need a limousine? But that is speculation. We are eagerly awaiting a report on the internal organs of our ‘star’. If he has two hearts, he should be sent to the legislative headquarters, and perhaps to some administrative Head Offices, including the Health Ministry. If he has two lungs, he may then soften air pollution which is now relentless. If he has two male organs, over-activated females are going to have a great time, - unlike we poor guys.

Back to the Editorial, the Co-chairs, consisting of more than two Heads, become worthy of analysis. One head can be a disadvantage in any organization or establishment, if the Head is a bad egg. All subordinates will then be rotten. A good Head will be a boon. The trouble with 2 heads is that they can be at loggerhead. Everyone will suffer, as we have frequently seen. Though Japan and the US were co-chairs, we cannot forget the tit for tat retaliation which followed Pearl Harbour, with Tokyo being bombed by B 27(?) planes, for the first time in history. And then, - Hiroshima and Nagasaki. How come Japan became Co-chair of the US for the sake of peace in Sri Lanka? Japan has not forgotten Sri Lanka, for the Good Samaritan services at the war crimes trial after the World War.

When two rotten Heads successively lead the world’s most prestigious political body, the future of right thinking people (and mankind) is doomed. As discussed under The Elders, Kofi Annan set the pace, and Ban did better than worse, with a bang. More about them is a waste of time, but, time will be when we have a good Head as Secretary General of the UN. We call upon all conscientious people to work relentlessly for that, having been through much suffering in the past years

The macabre Head of the LTTE hardly deserves further discussion. But the Head that succeeded him is now turning heads. Let us await developments before passing judgment. After all, Duttagamini, the wicked one, later became the great benefactor of our country, and built it and its monuments which we revere today. It is a pity that the man who headed the army and also saved us from the scourge of terrorism has become a controversial person. We would have liked to enable him to hold his head high, with integrity.

We have just commemorated Lakshman Kadirgamar. That was a Head which sustained us, even through the UN. So much has been said about him, that I need only allude to his heartwarming and head mending after - dinner speech to the young cricketers of SL. Your Editorial referred to the LTTE Leader, who bashed his own head in 2006, through a strategic blunder. Heads must roll for others to rise.

The heads of governments which engineered, manipulated and fostered on us a shameless CFA, are outstanding in their heinous hypocrisy and conspiracy.

Be warned, fellow country people, the complicity of foreign allies has not and will not relent. We must relentlessly keep our heads above our shoulders, when others are falling or losing theirs. We have had Headless Commissions and Commission-less Heads, and heads that fall when they do not comply and relent. Let us not hurtle head on into disaster. Decision making and governance can sometimes be better without a Head, - with lower level executives implementing policy decisions of sensible collective governors.