Tomorrow’s news of genocide, readied tonight

A shocking report is due to be released by Messrs Varatharajah and Shanmugarajah

By Catapult Thangavelu of Liberation Highway in Karayamullivaikal

(May 13, Jaffna, Sri Lanka Guardian) Messrs Shanmugarajah and Varatharajah, No Fire Zone Inc., have been preparing their latest news release all of last night. Tiger International leader Selvarajah Pathmanathan was quite annoyed that the figures of those killed announced by them yesterday were too small and that was why he had to increase the number to 1000 from the 300 odd.

This was soon made into 2000 by those who climbed the roof of the Westminster Abbey in London so that Her Majesty the Queen could hear them across Victoria. In Canada, the Gardiner Highway protesters chanting. "Our Leader Prabhakaran," made it 2500.

Some of them are said to be considering asking Canada to invade Sri Lanka and if that fails may appeal to Norway. We learn that in Canada all the LTTE leaders except Poopillai has gone underground and the university students have hijacked the Tiger interests there.

Now coming back to the expected news item, Wednesday morning soon after the Tigers fire shells at the civilians held by them, Messrs Shanmugarajah and Varatharajah are expected to announce 650 people were killed with nearly a thousand injured. They have been told they can increase the numbers if they want.

The announcement, they were directed, should clearly state that artillery fire bombarded the area relentlessly and the attack was totally merciless.

Appreciating the good work the British and French Foreign ministers were doing for the Tigers despite the fact some of them have danced the terror number in the surrounds of the British Parliament, Mr Pathmanathan was supposed to have stated money talks anywhere and the LTTE has the resources to make many people talk loud and clear.

We have, in the meantime learnt from some escapes from the human shield that Shanmugarajah is an animal doctor, some kind of a vet with dubious qualifications standing in the for the real doctor who has disappeared. It certainly is not his name. Varatharajah too may be a fake and in the Tiger world anything can happen. Some suggested he has two Tiger sentries with guns pointed at him 24 hours in turns, even when he drops on his bed. He enjoys no privacy even in his privy and has to do the Tamilnadu system.

What may not be known to the world yet and even difficult to understand is that Prabhakaran ceased to be of any consequence long ago. It is Pathmanathan who has taken over and that was why Tiger admirer Eric Solheim was keen to meet him and even introduce him to the UN Under Secretary Sir John Holmes.

Pottu Amman receives his orders from Pathmanathan.

Now that KP or Pathmanathan knows that the Tiger Underworld will not be able to have a land base in Sri Lanka he may very well ask the British Foreign Secretary Millibank to lease the Isle of Dogs for their use as the headquarters of the Tiger Underworld. But the French Foreign Minister may suggest Reunion, a former French protectorate in the western Indian Ocean.

Vai Gopalaswamy the man who probably knew the Tigers were going to assassinate the former Indian Prime Minister Rajiv Gandhi would rather have the LTTE under his nose and if he becomes a member of India’s ruling coalition, may suggest a few of the isles of the Andamans. They all have their self interests.

However, let’s hold our breath and await tomorrow’s news of genocide against the Tamils and we are told Foreign Minister Millibank has his Learjet ready to fly to Sri Lanka. It may well be not allowed to land.

Even if he is allowed to land it may just be too late for him for whatever he has in mind.

-Sri Lanka Guardian