By Dr.T.C.Rajaratnam
(February 16, Colombo, Sri Lanka Guardian) I was deeply moved by the article written by Elder Russell M. Nelson on Faith In Jesus Christ on Sunday, February 15, 2009 in the Sri Lanka Guardian. I was emotionally stirred and I broke down. It was then that I decided that I should write my testimony as well and expose my inner self as we came alone, we live some moments and go alone. But as for me all throughout my life, the major portion of my life I have been alone. Loneliness and aloneness are two miserable relatives who visit every human being at some point of time sometimes frequently or for long and for the fortunate for a short tenure.
Loneliness is a situation of being isolated and left alone whilst aloneness is voluntarily borne by oneself to be alone for reasons best known to the individual.
Gandhi's great respect for Christ is revealed in his following statements: "What does Jesus mean to me? To me, he was one of the greatest teachers humanity has ever had." "Jesus was the most active resister known perhaps to history. His was non-violence par excellence".
"Jesus expressed as no other could, the sprit and will of God. It is in this sense that I see him and recognize as the Son of God. And because the life of Jesus has the significance and the transcendency to which I have alluded, I believe that he belongs not solely to Christianity but to the entire world, to all races and people. It matters little under what flag, name or doctrine they may work, profess a faith or worship a God inherited from their ancestors"
On seeing a painting of the crucified Christ in Rome, Gandhi remarked "What would not I have given to be able to bow my head before the living image of Christ crucified. I saw there at once that nations like individuals could only be made through the agony of the cross and in no other way. Joy comes not out of infliction of pain on others but out of pain voluntarily borne by oneself."
Gandhi’s words keep echoing in my ears each time I hear a hymn. I have experienced the highest form of joy during the peek tenure of sadness and sorrow experienced - a sense of relief when we shed tears is another form of pain voluntarily borne by oneself.
For seven years, I brought up my daughter Rachel alone. She is ten years now. She is a devout Christian. She speaks to God in her prayers. God loves her. For her prayers are answered. I have been close to death several times but Rachel’s prayers were answered and she says God will never separate you from me as I have no one. There are times she asks God why she was deprived of a mother and why her mother left her for another man in the USA. She has never asked me those questions, lest I be hurt. Perhaps, God will answer her prayers .Our vacuum is filled by God but the sensitivity of a child is hard to bear. I know the times she is hurt but she tries not to reveal it lest I be hurt. Rachel is a great Christian bearing the cross in her heart.
We live in prayer, we pray for others and we have great consolation and solace in prayer. Very seldom do most people testify due to their pride to be humble. The scriptures say , he who exalteth himself shall be humbled and he who humbleth himself shalt be exalted.
There are three schools of suffering, each with its own special blessing to bestow: physical, mental, and the inner school which lies behind them both: loneliness of soul. Physical suffering makes for tenderness of heart and a patient judgment. Mental suffering gives a deepened sympathy, an active influence that, when "lifted up, draws all things to itself."
But loneliness of soul does more than this; it gives independence and strength. Even in the natural plane, it secures liberty of spirit, it develops clearness of judgment, and it enforces power of will. But this is by no means all....Loneliness of soul gives wisdom-- that breadth of vision that belongs to him who sees the entire valley from the hilltop. Loneliness of soul gives understanding-- that further power of seeing beneath the surfaces of life. Loneliness of soul gives counsel to sustain another, and fortitude to endure its own burden. All the seven gifts of the Holy Spirit come through and are fostered by loneliness of soul.
I shall conclude with a Prayer To Jesus, Agonising on the Mount of Olives
O Jesus, through the abundance of Thy love, and in order to overcome our hardheartedness, Thou pourest out torrents of Thy graces over those who reflect on Thy most Sacred Sorrow in the Garden of Gethsemane, and who spread devotion to Thee. I pray Thee, move my soul and my heart to think often, at least once a day, of Thy most bitter Agony in the Garden of Gethsemane, in order to communicate with Thee and to be united with Thee as closely as possible. O blessed Jesus, Thou, who carried the immense burden of our sins that night, and atoned for them fully; grant me the most perfect gift of complete repentant love over my numerous sins, for which Thou didst sweat blood. O blessed Jesus, for the sake of Thy most bitter struggle in the Garden of Gethsemane, grant me final victory over all temptations, especially over those to which I am most subject. O suffering Jesus, for the sake of Thy inscrutable and indescribable agonies, during that night of betrayal, and of Thy bitterest anguish of mind, enlighten me, so that I may recognize and fulfill Thy will; grant that I may ponder continually on Thy heart-wrenching struggle and on how Thou didst emerge victoriously, in order to fulfill, not Thy will, but the will of Thy Father. Be Thou blessed, O Jesus, for all Thy sighs on that holy night; and for the tears which Thou didst shed for us. Be Thou blessed, O Jesus, for Thy sweat of blood and the terrible agony, which Thou didst suffer lovingly in coldest abandonment and in inscrutable loneliness. Be Thou blessed, O sweetest Jesus, filled with immeasurable bitterness, for the prayer which flowed in trembling agony from Thy Heart, so truly human and divine. Eternal Father, I offer Thee all the past, present, and future Masses together with the blood of Christ shed in agony in the Garden of Sorrow at Gethsemane. Most Holy Trinity, grant that the knowledge, and thereby the love, of the agony of Jesus on the Mount of Olives will spread throughout the whole world. Grant, O Jesus, that all who look lovingly at Thee on the Cross, will also remember Thy immense Suffering on the Mount of Olives, that they will follow Thy example, learn to pray devoutly and fight victoriously, so that, one day, they may be able to Glorify Thee eternally in Heaven.”AMEN
We must learn to live by our conscience. Harm no one. Be polite and kind. Love one another.
There have been numerous miracles in our lives and we live by prayer alone and every word of God. Should any one seek assistance in prayer , you could contact me on tcrajaratnam@gmail.com
-Sri Lanka Guardian
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