TAF raids to make Diaspora happy

by S.De Silva

(August 27, Colombo, Sri Lanka Guardian) Displaying their indisputable superiority in air, two combat aircrafts from Tamil Eelam Airforce felt their way through darkness to drop two bombs, one in a jungle and the other one in a mess hall of a navy camp in Trinco in another fantastic display of expert marksmanship in aerial bombardment. Around 10 naval personnel and a large number of trees sustained injuries in this incident. The modern day Red Barons flew thousands and thousands of centimeters all the way up to Trinco in their modified Chitty Chitty bang bang like apparatuses, daringly evading radars that were built to detect objects larger than bicycles.

Tamilnet, the highly credible pro-LTTE website, reported that the whole of Trinco was rocked by massive explosions as one bomb from TAF (the one that didn’t target the jungle, by the way) crashed on to the mess hall in Navy damaging its roof (damage was done by the weight of the bomb which failed to explode!!) and injuring the occupants below. Tamilnet also reported that a large number of vehicles were seen rushing the 10 injured navel personnel to the hospital.

Upon noting the arrival of the two menacing fighter planes from TAF, the SLA (the once that are still left in the army by the way, as many “poor village boys” have deserted the army in droves according to Tamilnet) switched off the electricity in the area, blinding the brave fighter pilots and thus completely violating the Geneva Conventions Code of Conduct of Wars. Confusion reined as AA fire failed to discriminate the TAF planes with mosquitoes and in the process shot down hundreds of innocent mosquitoes, again violating the Geneva Conventions and endangering the lives of hundreds of nocturnal animals that chose to fly together in this finest hour by TAF.

Euphoria erupted among the Diaspora upon hearing the latest heroics by TAF and dispelled any doubts what-so–ever that their boys are faced with minuscule reversals in the battle front. Many a brave warriors in the Diaspora shed their playstations and Nintendos for the day and crawled out of the woodwork to brandish the mighty keyboards in online forums and cheered the heroics of their wonderful pilots.

The Great Thalaivar has well and truly injected a mega dose of Viagra in to the Diaspora and while the erection lasts, the Diaspora will continue to publicly display their proud manhoods, at least until the next village is captured by SLA.
- Sri Lanka Guardian